A FRIEND is one of the greatest blessings on earth. Tell me not of money; affection is better than gold; sympathy is better than lands. He is a poor man who has no friends. This world is full of sorrow because of its selfishness. It is a lonely and a dark place. In this disappointing world, the brightest sunbeam is a friend. Friendship halves our troubles and doubles our joys.
There are various causes, types, and motives for friendship. Genuine and fake friendships live side by side. We come across so many stories of sacrifices for friends and of betrayal and cheating. 85% percent of young people turn to their friend’s counsel at the time of crisis. So it is crucial to have the right type of friends to steer our life towards success.
Sometimes we think is there any help I can have in this area. How I too can have a friend? How should I choose my friend? What are the laws of friendship? This blog I have written to help you recognize the foundation of genuine friendship. How to be a friend? How to have the right friends; and the art of retaining them.
A friend loves at all times
The greatest blessing on earth is to have a friend. To have a friend you must be a friend starting with yourself. The greatest hunger a person has-is to be needed. Create that feeling in others. The greatest virtue is kindness. You can’t love everyone but you can be kind to anyone. Gossip cheapens the one who gossips more than the one gossiped about. Be the first to say ‘Hello! Good to see you.’ Don’t try to impress others. Let them have the fun of impressing you. When you listen, it draws people towards you.
The righteous* should choose their friends carefully
‘Tell me your friend, I will tell who you are’ goes the famous saying. It is powerful to have a friend who remains true to his conscience. The true extent of someone’s friendship must be measured by their deeds. Before you plunge, understand the depth. Shallowness won’t do.
Successful is the person who walks not in the advice, guidance, and direction, plan of action, warning, and recommendations of the wicked. Who is the wicked? Wicked are those who have no principles. They don’t have a law. They will do anything to be successful. Their mind has a fractured conscience and sees with a broken perspective. In any society, there are many who would violate ethics if it would help them to get ahead. Remember if he is cheating someone today, sooner or later, he is going to cheat on you also. Choosing the right friend today will guard you against years of regret and tears.
Two are better than one, if one falls down, his friend can help him up
To have a friend close is victory, is safety. A friend is there to pick us up and help us. A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out. Friendship is the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having to weigh neither thoughts nor measure words. It pays. What you have invested for years should help you in your need. Abandoning is cutting your hand or plucking your eye. The effects are crippling. You would have been much better with them.
Gossip separates close friends
No friendship by default is gossip-proof. We should make it gossip-proof. Have faith in your friend than anybody else. Do not allow gossip to destroy your friend’s image. After you accept the friendship (after you have chosen the right ones) do not spend time evaluating, criticising. To err is human and to forgive is divine. What is wrong if you give an opportunity to make mistakes to the one who loves you? MSP 27:10 says, ‘Never abandon a friend-either yours or your father’s’.
Wounds from a friend are better than kisses from an enemy!
Your friend has the ability to shape you. People are filled with garbage and extra baggage. Some are like grooves cut in our mind which makes us act and react in a predetermined pattern. Without these extras, we will look more beautiful. How are sculptures made? Hammer and chisel carve the stone to make it a perpetual beauty. Similarly, the right friends can carve a masterpiece out of us. Painful yet worth it. Give freedom to them. Let them hurt you. Unknowingly they are creating a song worth listening. Hurt by our friends is certainly better than the tender words and kisses of our enemy.
My friend, it is important that you evaluate your friendships. Friends who compel, taunt and manipulate you are or not your real friends. Love is giving not taking. Sacrifice is the essential ingredient of love. You need to have the right friends. What is the basis of your friendship? What is the hidden motive?
* The Righteous are those who have a standard, moral and ethical. They do not want to bend the rules and try to live by a right principle.